I recently watched a documentary on TV about the Californian band The Eagles...all 3hrs of it.
I wallowed in a sort of 'ah those were the days' stupor while remembering how much I had played their music over my younger years...being with one particular boyfriend one summer and having the eight track on repeat in the car.......'peaceful easy feeling' indeed.
What really struck me though was a very grown up thought.
When you are young and you really fancy the band you daydream about them picking you up out of the crowd and singing only for you before taking you across the invisible dividing line between 'star' and punter...and ultimately marrying you and writing songs only for you from ever onwards.
Which of course for most of us potato-faced people ain't never gonna happen.
I have never hung around a stage door, never asked for an autograph, I have always known that
the lead singer (or the drummer in my case) was only interested in that peculiarly confident optimistic girl...the groupie.
So watching a scene in the documentary where the band have a gaggle of girls back at the hotel and they are asking their names and joking around with them, I was conflicted..........and my two thoughts came from my two minds, the 'young yearning' me and the 'older wiser woman' me. On the one hand I was jealous and thought 'oh those lucky girls! got to go back stage and snog the boy who is the cutest thing on the planet' and 'oh my goodness..how embarrassing for those women...there they are for the world to now see as stupid shag anyone girls'.
Luckily, way back in my youth, my younger self knew I was with the potato-faced and knew that stars may have shagged anything with a pulse but in the end would only ever marry the pretty...or the connected to the industry/photographer/model/rich girl with good job.....I knew that the good looking marry the good looking and so I was sensible enough to just leave the concert and yearn.......
but I don't imagine that too many groupies got to marry their idol, so those girls are now middle aged woman looking at their younger selves on screen giving themselves away to guys who cared not a jot for them in any way whatsoever........and it got me wondering.
Would a fast fuck with a famous guy have been worth it? Maybe some of those girls would say yes...they have the memories after all........but if it wasn't............. then how sad to see yourself on screen in a documentary as a young hopeful whose life didn't work out how you wanted it to.