Saturday, February 27, 2010
see that previous post? that long listy thing? had to get my daughter to help me post it (at the beginning of blogging I vowed to become technologically able...never gonna happen...) and am not now sure that I like having posted it....I mean, what does a list like that say about a person? but then who cares? its my blog I guess and I can write what I like.....so another time I will elaborate on one or two of the points or even add some or subtract some (oh the power.. the power..its thrilling...)...for instance......ever stolen something? canoed? farted in public? been arrested? hand fed a squirrel?.....OK so thats only me then...will think of some others...or please feel free to join in....
This is just for fun. Here's a list of 99 things. Bold the ones you have done and post on your blog! =)
Started your own blog
Slept under the stars
Played in a band
Visited Hawaii
Watched a meteor shower
Given more than you can afford to charity
Been to Disneyland
Climbed a mountain
Held a praying mantis
Sang a solo
Bungee jumped
Visited Paris
Watched a lightening storm
Taught yourself an art from scratch
Adopted a child
Had food poisoning
Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
Grown your own vegetables
Seen the Mona Lisa in France
Slept on an overnight train
Had a pillow fight
Hitch hiked
Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
Built a snow fort
Held a lamb
Gone skinny dipping
Run a Marathon
Ridden in a gondola in Venice
Seen a total eclipse
Watched a sunrise or sunset
Hit a home run
Been on a cruise
Seen Niagara Falls in person
Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
Seen an Amish community
Taught yourself a new language
Had enough money to be truly satisfied
Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
Gone rock climbing
Seen Michelangelo’s David
Sung karaoke
Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
Visited Africa
Walked on a beach by moonlight
Been transported in an ambulance
Had your portrait painted
Gone deep sea fishing
Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
Kissed in the rain
Played in the mud
Gone to a drive-in theater
Been in a movie
Visited the Great Wall of China
Started a business
Taken a martial arts class
Visited Russia
Served at a soup kitchen
Sold Girl Scout Cookies
Gone whale watching
Got flowers for no reason
Donated blood, platelets or plasma
Gone sky diving
Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
Bounced a check
Flown in a helicopter
Saved a favorite childhood toy
Visited the Lincoln Memorial
Eaten Caviar
Pieced a quilt
Stood in Times Square
Toured the Everglades
Been fired from a job
Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
Broken a bone
Been a passenger on a motorcycle
Seen the Grand Canyon in person
Published a book
Visited the Vatican
Bought a brand new car
Walked in Jerusalem
Had your picture in the newspaper
Kissed a stranger at midnight on New Year’s Eve
Visited the White House
Killed and prepared an animal for eating
Had chickenpox
Saved someone’s life
Sat on a jury
Met someone famous
Joined a book club
Got a tattoo
Had a baby
Seen the Alamo in person
Swam in the Great Salt Lake
Been involved in a law suit
Owned a cell phone
Been stung by a bee
Started your own blog
Slept under the stars
Played in a band
Visited Hawaii
Watched a meteor shower
Given more than you can afford to charity
Been to Disneyland
Climbed a mountain
Held a praying mantis
Sang a solo
Bungee jumped
Visited Paris
Watched a lightening storm
Taught yourself an art from scratch
Adopted a child
Had food poisoning
Walked to the top of the Statue of Liberty
Grown your own vegetables
Seen the Mona Lisa in France
Slept on an overnight train
Had a pillow fight
Hitch hiked
Taken a sick day when you’re not ill
Built a snow fort
Held a lamb
Gone skinny dipping
Run a Marathon
Ridden in a gondola in Venice
Seen a total eclipse
Watched a sunrise or sunset
Hit a home run
Been on a cruise
Seen Niagara Falls in person
Visited the birthplace of your ancestors
Seen an Amish community
Taught yourself a new language
Had enough money to be truly satisfied
Seen the Leaning Tower of Pisa in person
Gone rock climbing
Seen Michelangelo’s David
Sung karaoke
Seen Old Faithful geyser erupt
Bought a stranger a meal at a restaurant
Visited Africa
Walked on a beach by moonlight
Been transported in an ambulance
Had your portrait painted
Gone deep sea fishing
Seen the Sistine Chapel in person
Been to the top of the Eiffel Tower in Paris
Gone scuba diving or snorkeling
Kissed in the rain
Played in the mud
Gone to a drive-in theater
Been in a movie
Visited the Great Wall of China
Started a business
Taken a martial arts class
Visited Russia
Served at a soup kitchen
Sold Girl Scout Cookies
Gone whale watching
Got flowers for no reason
Donated blood, platelets or plasma
Gone sky diving
Visited a Nazi Concentration Camp
Bounced a check
Flown in a helicopter
Saved a favorite childhood toy
Visited the Lincoln Memorial
Eaten Caviar
Pieced a quilt
Stood in Times Square
Toured the Everglades
Been fired from a job
Seen the Changing of the Guards in London
Broken a bone
Been a passenger on a motorcycle
Seen the Grand Canyon in person
Published a book
Visited the Vatican
Bought a brand new car
Walked in Jerusalem
Had your picture in the newspaper
Kissed a stranger at midnight on New Year’s Eve
Visited the White House
Killed and prepared an animal for eating
Had chickenpox
Saved someone’s life
Sat on a jury
Met someone famous
Joined a book club
Got a tattoo
Had a baby
Seen the Alamo in person
Swam in the Great Salt Lake
Been involved in a law suit
Owned a cell phone
Been stung by a bee
Friday, February 26, 2010
Wednesday, February 24, 2010
Want to be this age again. Wish I could go back and take different turns in the road. Know that I can't.......have had a 'bitter and twisted' type day today....started off with a bastard of a customer that just made me want to shout 'fuck off' to his face....followed on by two bone idle skiving colleagues who just leave the work to the rest of us and have no notion of 'team work'....it is also fucking cold in this house.....have just had a bowl of porridge for dinner as I can't be arsed to cook...if I were a few years younger I'd think I had pmt....but no its just me being a grumpy old lady....with no brooch or per una cardi in sight (that's for you Auntiegwen) and in fact looking at this pic of mum with me makes me smile and feel a bit better...and the porridge is kicking in 'cos I'm not so hungry and I might go and have a glass of wine (again...that's 3 nights in a row....)and today is nearly done and tomorrow is yet to come ...so God willing I will greet a new, happier tomorrow.
Saturday, February 20, 2010
Saturday night....watching Revolutionary Road...never wanted to but am bored...quite into it now.......makes me want to 'leave messages' for my kids....have already written goodbye letters last year 'just in case'........maybe it is the 3 glasses of wine loosening me up but I wish I could make sure that when I am dead and gone my daughter will laugh when she remembers the whispering gallery in new york or the 'humming while playing with my food' story from Grandma and that my son will smile if he thinks about my sign language to him every time he drives away from the house and 'true colours'....I can't ensure anything.....I can't will the world to be a good place or the fates to give my kids health and happiness.......just keep putting one foot in front of the other and thanking my lucky, beautiful, stars
Friday, February 19, 2010
Tuesday, February 16, 2010
Monday, February 15, 2010
Excuse the poor quality of the photo (all the blogs I read seem to have amazing photographs) that you see here....
but this is a drawing that is stuck up on the inside of my wardrobe door....it is in fact a portrait of me that my lovely daughter did many years ago and now makes me smile every time I see it. I have, I admit, a terrible temper....I am what I call a 'fast, furious, shouty explosion of a temper and then...peace' person whereas my husband is a 'quiet, no argument, simmer and drag on and on and on for ever in a sulk' kind of person....perfectly suited there then are'nt we!! And when the kids were little we never thought that hitting our kids was ever an option (please don't judge me on this ...everyone has a different point of view, and smacking etc., was'nt something that I ever could countenance....) so at times our house was 'shouty and loud' or sulky but there was never any physicality.....and I know that behaviour like ours can be just as bad as a smack etc.,and tempting the fates here again, but our kids have turned out to be just the best....I know I'm biased here......and we laugh about the portrait now.....and it taught me to try and 'stop, breathe and calm down'.
Anyhoo....unhappily when my daughter did this portrait (unbidden I might say...) and then presented it to me I was saddened and shamed.....this gorgeuous little blonde thing saying 'this is what you look like when you shout'. Long story short the picture went up, to be seen daily, and it has served me well over many years....even the 'what the f..k is this all about' menopause years..
now long gone thank goodness....and reminds me every day not to be a bad tempered mum from hell.......just wish she had done something similar for her dad!!!!
Thursday, February 11, 2010
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
I guess romance is not dead...yet...you see some months ago my friend gave me this hot water bottle as a gift...I did'nt think it was something I would ever use...but just recently, as usual, I was going to bed later than my husband (he is a very early riser/I faff about on the laptop in the evening) and discovered that he had put the hot water bottle just in the right place for me....so that when I initially got into my side of our (quite large) bed I would get warm 'but still snuggle up..the bottle was'nt a replacement for him'...
Sunday, February 7, 2010
My dad (82 and quite a tall, well built chap) fell over this week......poor thing never usually falls and it has taken him by surprise and shaken him slightly....it has also given him a gash/bump just above his eye that bled quite badly at the time but now seems to be ok.
Spending some time with him yesterday was a curious 'normal' day that was tinged with me thinking things like ' he could have killed himself....one day he won't be here' and missing him so even though he was right in front of me...does that make sense??......
As I left my parents house I kissed and hugged them both as usual and really tried to remember how they felt and smelt and laughed....am I morbid?
ANYHOO....apropos my previous post and my list I have already made inroads into quite a few of the things listed.....had my longest serving best friend to stay on Friday night (drank too much and sat up till 1 talking..I know .....1 in the morning!!! ) and I have booked tickets for two gigs for later in the year.....
Spending some time with him yesterday was a curious 'normal' day that was tinged with me thinking things like ' he could have killed himself....one day he won't be here' and missing him so even though he was right in front of me...does that make sense??......
As I left my parents house I kissed and hugged them both as usual and really tried to remember how they felt and smelt and laughed....am I morbid?
ANYHOO....apropos my previous post and my list I have already made inroads into quite a few of the things listed.....had my longest serving best friend to stay on Friday night (drank too much and sat up till 1 talking..I know .....1 in the morning!!! ) and I have booked tickets for two gigs for later in the year.....
Monday, February 1, 2010
So.....it's the first day of a new month...and over recent days I have howled at the big bright moon (yes..something me and my daughter do...started out as something that made us laugh when she was little and now seems to be a 'womanly' thing that we just do....) and helped my big sister buy a new bed (and why, when I persuaded her to lie on it with me did I feel the need to say 'she's my sister' to the weird salesman?) and decided that this year I will endeavour to......
a) visit my big brother in Seattle
b) have a weekend away with my sister (other one) possibly Paris??
c) try really hard to be the friend I should be....not the shite sub standard one that I am
d)get to more concerts/exhibitions/whatnots
e)not give a fuck about the job, which I have to keep, and just dream on about winning the lottery
f) remember that as my recent mammagram result was good I should just 'thank the Lord and pass the whiskey' every bloody day
g) organise something nice for my big sisters 60th and my moms 80th
h) eat less crap
i) try to get on with my neighbour to the right...even though she has a face like a smacked arse
and an attitude
j) try to improve my marriage and get on better with my husband ......times are tough at the moment and there is a foggy shadowy distance between us sometimes.....always of my making..he deserves better possibly
k) pay attention....to the people in my life and also that little voice inside me that guides me
l) stop being such a jealous person...I am really ashamed of myself for this.....I COVET big time.
m) mooch about in charity shops..yes...........buy so much in charity shops....no
n) try to stop worrying ALL THE TIME...as my friend pointed out to me, in every old photo I am the one with the biting my lip and frowning face
o) try to be more tolerant and patient
p) realise that sometimes OCD is not a good comforting meditative thing but just me being a nit picking pain in the arse ..... the world will not end if the zips on the cushions are all showing or the labels on the towels are facing me.....
q) hug more
r) save??
s)clear this house of all the crap I have accumulated over the years .... HOARDING is just nonsense.
t) join a class?
u) rediscover the garden (literally....get stuck in and make it a good place to be)
v) accept that ..OK I have no career....I still have a mortgage...am embarrassed to meet old school friends and long lost family as I am a failure and a true example of mrs middle....middle aged , middle looking, middle ability to do anything and big ability to do fuck all well, but my family love me so I need to SHUT THE FUCK UP ....... SELF PITY IS SO VERY VERY UGLY
w) stop being so judgemental.
x) kiss my babies whenever I can.....babies no more but still my joy
y) learn from the blogs I read
z) ?????????
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Sometimes this is just the right thing to hear......
Gavin Bryars...Jesus' blood never failed me yet.........look it up on youtube. I love Tom Waits and the one time I saw him live in Lon...
